Headstrong: How to be mentally strong | Manlihood ManCast with Josh Hatcher : a podcast for men –
Manlihood ManCast
In this episode of the Manlihood ManCast, Josh Hatcher talks about the building the muscle of your mind. We hear a lot of talk about physical exercise and strength building. Which is good! But we need to talk about building up the mind, too.
Garbage In / Garbage Out
What we consume affects what we produce.
Doing reps
We need to use affirmations to build up and tone muscle. Repeat truth to yourself until you believe it.
Powerlifting
If you want to be headstrong, it takes time. You’ve got to keep working it over time. I can guarantee you, you are already stronger than you think you are.
Discipline equals freedom.
We think of discipline as uncomfortable – but you’ve got to TRAIN your brain how to think. It literally rewrites your brain chemistry! (Look up Dr. Caroline Leaf’s research on this!) If you build healthy habits in the way you think, it really does set you free. But it takes discipline!
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Josh Hatcher of Manlihood.com talks about the most important piece of furniture you own.
The Kitchen Table.
Eating dinner with your family is one of the most important things you can do. It’s no always easy to do in today’s world – but it’s important to make it a priority as often as possible. Even eating around your kitchen table with friends has a tremendous value!
Manlihood ManCast Podcast for Men from Josh Hatcher of Manlihood.com
Josh Hatcher of Manlihood.com speaks with author and journalist Chuck Holton about manhood, his experiences with the Free Burma Rangers, and how to overcome fear.
Josh Hatcher talks about how a man should respond to the Coronavirus pandemic, the panic, and quarantine.
1. Be a protector.
You are a shepherd, a protector of your family and your community. Keep them safe, provide for them, and protect them. If that means following a bunch of rules you think are stupid so that your family and neighbors are safe, then do it. But protect and provide for them.
2. Be a thermostat.
Not a thermometer. Don’t react in emotion – rather set the emotional temperature for those around you. Be calm. Be at peace. Control your emotions.
3. Love your family
Enjoy the time that your kids are home from school. Eat dinner together. Invest in those relationships. Don’t gripe about how badly behaved they are – or drink to numb yourselves from the way they act. Rather – if they are unruly – teach them how to behave with discipline and love!
Last week we featured Jared Conti’s poem, “Ah, Fatherhood” for our Creative Thursday post – this week – we get to hear from Jared as he talks about it! Check out the poem here.
In this episode of the Manlihood Mancast, Josh Hatcher talks about the difference between Nice and Kind.
There is a difference between being “nice” and being “kind.”
I’d rather be “kind” than be “nice.”
Kindness is intentional and outward. It takes courage to be kind. It takes action and it doesn’t always do what everyone else wants.
Niceness is passive, and receptive. It doesn’t take effort, and it doesn’t require action. It doesn’t rock the boat.
They may seem like subtle differences, but the mindset between being “nice” and being “kind” are very different.
People frequently describe me as a “nice guy.”
But I don’t think they understand the difference.
You don’t have to be a pushover. You don’t have to keep your mouth shut when someone needs to hear the truth. You don’t have to always be agreeable and compliant.
It’s okay to stand up for yourself, and others. It’s okay to fight for what’s right.
It’s also okay to treat people with kindness, and respect, and to go out of your way to smile and show love to people. This does not indicate weakness, or submission.
Finding this balance, I believe is the key that unlocks many many things.
In this episode of the Manlihood Mancast, Josh Hatcher tells us what you need to know about being a dad.
Got kids? Listen, to father a child is simple. Anyone with the right equipment can impregnate a woman.
But that does not mean that fatherhood is simple. There’s a few things you need to know about being a dad.
1. This matters. A lot.
43% of US children live without their father [US Department of Census]
90% of homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes. [US D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census]
80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes. [Criminal Justice & Behaviour, Vol 14, pp. 403-26, 1978]
71% of pregnant teenagers lack a father. [U.S. Department of Health and Human Services press release, Friday, March 26, 1999]
63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes. [US D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census]
85% of children who exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes. [Center for Disease Control]
90% of adolescent repeat arsonists live with only their mother. [Wray Herbert, “Dousing the Kindlers,” Psychology Today, January, 1985, p. 28]
71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. [National Principals Association Report on the State of High Schools]
75% of adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes. [Rainbows f for all God’s Children]
85% of youths in prisons grew up in a fatherless home. [Fulton County Georgia jail populations, Texas Department of Corrections, 1992]
Fatherless boys and girls are: twice as likely to drop out of high school; twice as likely to end up in jail; four times more likely to need help for emotional or behavioral problems. [US D.H.H.S. news release, March 26, 1999]
Your kids need you to be present – but that doesn’t mean in the building, playing X-Box and yelling at them. Change diapers. Show them how to treat their mother by treating her good yourself. Tell them that you love them. Laugh with them.
3. Discipline equals freedom
This little formula for success, made popular by Jocko Willink is true. Don’t get hung up on the idea that discipline is spanking. Discipline is training. Train those kids in the path they are supposed to walk. Doing so – will ensure that they have FREEDOM in the rest of their life.
4. This is hard.
I’m not gonna lie. Being a dad is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. It’s not easy to clean up puke at 2am. It’s not easy to work two jobs to pay the bills, AND make sure that my kids feel the weight of my presence in their lives. It’s not easy to try to set an example, when what I want to do is whine and gripe.
5. But it’s worth it.
Gosh, Kids are great. Watching them grow from little beans bouncing in mom’s belly to fully grown adults, making responsible choices, and working hard and contributing to society. It’s rewarding. I’ve heard it said that kids are like arrows in the hands of a warrior. (Blessed is he whose quiver is full of them.) I draw them back, aim them, and let them fly. And sometimes we miss, but seeing them hit the mark is the most rewarding feeling I’ve ever known.
6. If you wait till you’re ready, you never will.
You’ll never be able to “afford” to have kids. Having kids isn’t something you can be ready for. What you need to do the job comes with them. Pops right out with the umbilical cord. You think you aren’t ready for this, and then the doc hands you that baby, and you feel the weight of the responsibility, and the joy and pride of making a life, and all at once, you’re given what you need.
7. You have to choose.
So, you’re handed a baby and a new name (Daddy) and you now have to choose to accept the challenge. Here’s the thing. I don’t believe that rejecting it’s an option. I mean, people DO reject it. But you shouldn’t. You choose then and there to be a father. And you make that choice, day in and day out to make sure their needs are met, that the example is set for them, that they are loved, cherished, corrected, and challenged. You have to choose it.
Episode 20: Welcome To Daddyhood – Part 4 – Be a Better Man
A wise man once told that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting the different results.The same guy told me about the CANEI Principle. (Constant and Never Ending Improvement)
I think that all too often, as men, we don’t give any thought at all to our own self-improvement. We do our job, we come home, we go to bed, we get up – and we do it all again.
I think that it is important to understand that our children – even when they are babies, are learning from us. When we look at them – we can SEE the CANEI principle at work, right? They start off pooping and screaming, and then gradually learn to walk and talk and wipe their own butts. Soon, they are reading, building with legos, playing football, driving, dating, marrying, and parenting!
It’s important for us to try not to forget our need to improve as well! We want our little boys to grow up to be good men, who never stop improving! We want our little girls to be good women, who keep growing and maturing, right?
Part of being a good dad is to constantly be striving to be a better man.
Your kids are watching every step you take. And what they see will determine how they live the rest of their lives. Yeah – I know that’s a big challenge. If you don’t measure up – at least let them see you trying to improve.
This was originally published in January of 2015. See the full post here:
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This episode is produced by Hatcher Media for Manlihood.com Our Manly theme music is from Austin Stirling and also from Mark Kroos. Be sure to subscribe and leave us a review on iTunes, Youtube, or wherever you are listening to the show! Tune in again for more of the Manlihood ManCast