Mark Twain – #ManCrushMonday
In the beginning of a change, the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot. ~Mark Twain, Notebook, 1935
Josh Hatcher
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The Gatekeepers: Mindsets: You influence the way your family thinks about things.
Men have a special role in their families that they often neglect. There are outside forces that influence your families – and what comes into your home needs to go through you. You are the keeper of the gate – the man who determines what influences are allowed to pass through.
Mindsets are like fortresses. The way a person thinks will determine the life he lives.
As a gatekeeper – it’s your job to understand the way your family thinks – and to correct the attitudes that you see that are contrary to the truth, and to your values.
If your daughter says, “I am so ugly.” It’s up to you to correct that, and tell her the truth.
If your son displays a negative attitude about doing his chores – you need to correct that.
If YOU have a bad attitude – you need to correct that.
You can try to correct behavior – but long before behavior happens, a mindset happens. You can not only correct bad mindsets, but you can build good mindsets, by speaking the truth at every opportunity!
John Steinbeck – #ManCrushMonday
“Why do men like me want sons?” he wondered. “It must be because they hope in their poor beaten souls that these new men, who are their blood, will do the things they were not strong enough nor wise enough nor brave enough to do. It is rather like another chance at life; like a new bag of coins at a table of luck after your fortune is gone.” _ John Steinbeck, Cup of Gold
The Gatekeepers: Media: You determine what voices speak into your family’s life
Men have a special role in their families that they often neglect. There are outside forces that influence your families – and what comes into your home needs to go through you. You are the keeper of the gate – the man who determines what influences are allowed to pass through.
This week, we’ll be talking about “Media.”
The truth is – our culture has a number of voices shouting a number of messages – many of them are contrary to the values that we have established in our homes. I know our values are different from home to home – but I often wonder why if we have ever thought about just what those values are – and if we have thought about what an impact opposing voices can have on our values.
For example – if you have daughters, you may want them to keep their sexuality reserved for later in life. We want them to be valued for their minds, and not their bodies. We want them to see their natural beauty, and know that they aren’t supposed to be measured by what society determines is beautiful – And yet – we allow them to listen to music that is encouraging a different attitude aout sexuality, and we allow them to watch movies that demean women, and we let them read magazines that reinforce false ideas about real beauty.
We raise our sons to exercise self-control – and yet we allow them to watch television shows that portray a lack of self-control as a noble thing.
Let me encourage you to be the gatekeeper in your home. Identify what truths and values you want to uphold – and limit media that contradicts this. It doesn’t mean you have to shut all media out – and some media can be countered with lots of good conversation about your values – but some things just don’t have business in your homes! Your family may HATE you for enforcing family “censorship” – but if you are careful, and if you commuicate clearly, and compassionately – I think you’ll be able to smooth that out.
By the way – the idea of “The Gatekeepers” came from a sermon at Open Arms Community Church. Feel free to check it out here:
http://openarmsbradford.org/wp/the-gate-keepers/
Theodore Roosevelt – #ManCrushMonday
“Never throughout history has a man who lived a life of ease left a name worth remembering.” _ Theodore Roosevelt
What boys do… Part 4 – Run their mouths #boys2men
Remember that 90’s RnB Group Boys II Men? Yeah. They were great. That has nothing to do with what we’re talking about though. What we’re talking about is common behaviors that should have died off when a boy became a man.
Today we’re going to talk about RUNNING YOUR MOUTH.
Loose lips sink ships. This is not only true about accidentally spilling government secrets – but about the power of talking too much.
I think the key to keeping our speech at a minimum is learning to T.H.I.N.K. before we speak!
T – is it True?
H – is it Helpful?
I – is it Inspiring?
N – is it Necessary?
K – is it Kind?
So often, the speaking we do can tear people down, not build them up. It can reveal more details than we should. It can create an image in the minds of others about us that push them away from us. It can create self-defeat, by establishing a negative attitude in ourselves!
Boys don’t think before they speak. Men carefully use their words to bring life.
C.S. Lewis – #ManCrushMonday
“the difference between the old and the new education being) in a word, the old was a kind of propagation – men transmitting manhood to men; the new is merely propaganda.” C.S. Lewis, The Abolition of Man
What boys do… Part 3 – Waste Time #boys2men
Remember that 90’s RnB Group Boys II Men? Yeah. They were great. That has nothing to do with what we’re talking about though. What we’re talking about is common behaviors that should have died off when a boy became a man.
This week we’re going to talk about WASTING TIME.
When we are young – time seems to move slower. My friend Mike McAvoy says that life is like a roll of toilet paper – and it goes faster the closer you get to the end of the roll. Now – Mike is a preacher, not a physicist – but it seems to make sense enough to me.
There is nothing wrong with boys who spend their vast amount of slow-moving time tossing baseballs around, or playing cops and robbers, or building with plastic blocks, or catching fish.
But when a boy becomes a man – and his time starts to move faster – his time becomes currency. And a man uses his currency and his time wisely.
Does that mean he abandons all leisure pursuits? Certainly not! It’s perfectly acceptable for a man to sit on a shore with a hook in the water, waiting for a fish.
But what it does mean is that he is intentional with his time. Every minute spent is used for a greater purpose. Leisure is not about wasting time – but rather about recharging yourself spiritually, physically and mentally. We use our leisure as an investment in ourselves and in our families.
If we make it a point to manage our time, we find ourselves less stressed, and more productive.
Here are some time management resources:
http://lifehacker.com/tag/time-management
http://www.studygs.net/timman.htm
Boys waste time. Men use their time wisely, and invest it as currency.
Tune in next week for Part 4 of “What Boys Do…” – Run their mouths.
What boys do… Part 2 – Fight #boys2men
Remember that 90’s RnB Group Boys II Men? Yeah. They were great. That has nothing to do with what we’re talking about though. What we’re talking about is common behaviors that should have died off when a boy became a man.
This week we’re talking about FIGHTING.
Certainly – there is a time and a place for that glorious moment that a bully or a tyrant receive a blow to the nose. I firmly believe that when people say, “Violence is never the answer” they forget that there are things worth fighting for – and there are people who need to be corrected with physical force.
But we’re not talking about fighting for a greater purpose. We’re talking about the schoolyard scrapping, and drunken brawls, and incessant need to win every argument – whether by force or sheer ego.
Many times people fight for the sake of proving their strength. Real men do not need such victories to define their worth.
If I’m minding my own business, and a man physically assaults me, I’m going to defend myself, and I’m going to do what it takes to win. But fighting and arguing and winning should never be what drives me, or motivates me.
A man should be secure enough in his self and in his own strength that he doesn’t need to pick fights and push his way to the top.
When I was a boy – I had to fight almost every day. I was bullied and pushed around. There were times when my fights were to protect myself, and times when my fights were to prove myself. I wish that I could have understood that I didn’t need to prove myself with my fists… or for that matter, with my arguments.
The truth is – you can be right, and you can be better than everyone else in the room, without it mattering whether or not everyone knows it.
Boys fight to prove their worth. Men know their worth, and only fight to protect and defend.
Tune in next week for Part 3 of “What Boys Do…” – Waste Time
Ethan Allen – #ManCrushMonday
“Ever since I arrived to a state of manhood, I have felt a sincere passion for liberty. The history of nations doomed to perpetual slavery, in consequence of yielding up to tyrants their natural born liberties, I read with a sort of philosophical horror; so that the first systematical and bloody attempt at Lexington, to enslave America, thoroughly electrified my mind, and fully determined me to take part with my country.” Ethan Allen