In our culture today – there is a rampant “victim mentality” – and while we don’t want to take away the legitimate issues that a real victim of a crime or abuse faces – we think somehow people have used their status as victim as a cop out, or invented reasons to identify as a victim.
This was something hard for me to learn. A decade ago, I felt pretty entitled. I felt I “deserved” a lot of things. And as a result, I wasn’t as grateful as I should have been for what I really did receive from others.
I think I damaged a lot of friendships doing this.
I’m not sure when things changed – and I can’t say that they have changed all the way across the board, but I can say that my attitude is different, and looking back on who I was, there is definitely a part of me that has been left back there – and I’m glad for it.
What I can tell you is this. No one owes you anything. If we live our lives expecting people to hand us anything, we’ll not only alienate all of our friends, but we’ll create a situation where our value is puffed up and manufactured, and not based on our actual value. When something goes wrong, when crisis comes, we are left feeling bankrupt.
Instead of viewing yourself as “owed” – let’s make a point to fight back those feelings and replace them with a gratitude for those that WE owe….
The truth is – no matter how “self-made” you think you are, you are really made by many who have invested in your life.
Be known as a thankful and grateful person… and be known as the person that is investing in others to build them up, as well. It’s your way of paying back the debt that others have invested in you.